Colour Charts of My Watercolour Sets

After all those years that I’ve been "seriously" painting, I made my aquarelle colour chart. Аfter all, artists normally do so, don’t they? 😄 I have one "professional" box, "Nevskaya Palitra" of 12 colours (1st photo). And the other two are honey watercolour sets, "Luch" of 14 and 24 colours. As I compared them I saw the notorious difference in the quality of pigments.

I remember that happiness, so cool that was having 24 colours (I was very much fond of anime style back then)! And now I think: so cool it is to be able to mix paints so that you get all these and many other amazing colours😍

Sometimes it gets tough without special education. At some stage, you understand that there are more white gaps than painted areas, and what others jump from like from a springboard, is some impassable jungle to you. But I just move at my own pace. Is there anything I don’t know? So, sooner or later I will learn that😊

 

Learning to Love

It's strange, but only today I'm learning to love.
New destiny has begun from the moment you came.
This new me
is measuring out life.
Understanding. And dreaming that everything will be okay.
It's crowded inside - so much I have got to write yet,
singing out this tenderness, saved deeply within!
I'm lacking words. But not lacking strength to wait,
and to say it all with my eyes, smile, all my essence,
emitting joy and hope, aspiration to be
a favouring wind and stars of eternal love.
This is true - today I'm just learning this, how to love.
I will learn, I will wait till the moment when you'll call me.

Talk to Me to Let Me See You

That’s how Socratus said to a handsome young man.

And that’s what Mikhail Litvak, a famous Russian psychotherapist, says about beauty. Here’s an extract from his book “How To See And Change Your Destiny”, chapter “Psychology Of Beauty” (I couldn't find it in English, so translated by myself, sorry if there are any mistakes).

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Time for myself

Feeling so tremendously tired but happy coz I'm having weekend. First weekend without work. It's even strange.

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Being a mother

From FB.


A human body can bear only 45 del (unit) of pain. But at the time of giving birth,a mother feels upto 57 del of pain... This is similar to 20 bones getting fractured, all at the same time. 
This is just to tell you the extent to which a mother loves her child!

Chetan Bhagat About Achievements

All I would say is that the world might underestimate you, but do not underestimate yourself. With hard work, a strong will, a humble attitude and a willingness to learn new things – one can achieve a lot in life. 

I will warm up your heart...

Wind is driving forth frowning clouds in the sky. 

That is life running randomly, haunting somebody’s thresholds,

Hitting itself on the walls, yearning in search of the way out. 

All the hardships and worries are just like a whirlpool. 

Wind is whistling, and night is rushing getting furious. 

No, it’s not fear, just some incomprehensible grief. 

Heart is decreasing its pace and is standing still for a moment, 

Seems it’s impossible to overcome such a terrible cold. 

Oh my love, why this cold and why are you feeling so lonely? 

Why are you closing your eyes, why don’t you believe? 

We often consider that heavens appear to be very cruel. 

But what if it’s not cruelty but just a door to the better? 

Stand up. I know that you can. And I know you remember, 

Nothing that’s given to us is beyond our strength. 

Look at the sunrise, you won’t let your head down now. 

I will warm up your sorrowful heart, my beloved one. 

Believe in ourselves

I've Found

I've been always looking for you among thousands of faces,
I was never tired believing, calling and loving.
I was already loving you, lovely shadow in my soul.
I couldn't give it up and I was moving towards you.
The road was not easy - pain, hopes, anguish...
I've seen lots, they were not from our dream.
They didn't know what were depth and warmth.
One-day passion, cold calculations - but not love.
Or a pile of amenities and loud empty words.
Those short meetings taught me one thing:
Hoping for a miracle, being silent and forgetting -
I've never been such, I won't be and I don't think I should...
I didn't want much. Understanding of dreams,
Nobility and cordiality, and intimate simplicity.
To feel protection and to give all my love,
To forget the pain, to return strength again.
I was feeling lack of it - in people, in the world, in fate.
I was making mistakes. But I was searching.
And I've found everything in you.

Russian original:

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John Mayer - Stop This Train

Lyrics

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Morning Pages Journal, July 4 2011, Mon

Morning Pages Journal, according to Julia Cameron's book "The Artist's Way", is the best way of relaxing and knowing yourself. You just wake up every morning, take a copybook and a pen and write everything that comes into your head, for half an hour, until you cover 3 pages. Each and Everything, even if you think it's crap. I would say MPJ is really great and helpful. It brought good solutions and ideas to me, and also discovered something I would never think of knowingly. 

My retrospective review.

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I'm happy with him.

I love you my wonder.
And I want to see you happy.
Not that you should smile... not that.
But I want you to reach everything you wish.

I stopped blogging for a while...

And I even know why.
Love gives me so many possibilities of self-expression, so many events in my inner life that sometimes I just don't need to express myself anyhow.
Everything I could write here I'm discussing with Dev now. Everything I've ever dreamt of, thought of, I also discuss with him... Here I get not only self-expression but also a wonderful feedback and comments, together with a glance, a touch, a kiss. So now I'm feeling so content that for some time I even stopped keeping diaries.

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This is only beginning...

This is only beginning.
Roads and wind.
Along silent railways
and under clouds.
Petty things have become
smaller and smaller...
Only sky is around,
and it's opened to us -
I know that now.
And we're inseparable,
like links of chain...
No, we're stronger.
We'll melt in embrace.
It's so tender and strong,
this interlacing of destiny
and living love.


Это только начало.
Дороги и ветер.
По замершим рельсам -
и под облака.
И мелкое стало
всё мельче и мельче...
Кругом только небо,
открытое нам -
теперь это знаю.
И мы неразрывны,
как звенья цепи...
Нет, мы крепче с тобой.
В объятьях растаем.
Так нежно и сильно
сплетенье судьбы...
и живая любовь.

Imagination

Stop and Start...

A sudden thought

Yes, one of those that frequently come into my head without any previous notice. I was just thinking that the book “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron has awakened the artist sleeping within me. Really. Now whatever I draw or paint I do that in some different way. I’m much more serious towards whatever I create nowadays. And at the same time whatever I do I do it in a bit playful mood… not to fancy too much ^_^ 

But this is not the main thing actually. The main thing is that… seems like thanks to that very book… now I can FEEL without fear. I wasn’t forcing events, I just let myself feel. I just let it flow like river flows. And now this river carries me into the open sea. And even that is not scary to me. Not anymore. Perhaps I’m like a sailor now… who’s been on a firm land for too long and is missing that very open sea. To feel embrace of waves and kisses of sun, to feel freedom and delight.

Maybe after some time I’ll be watching forward with strange grief, waiting to be the first one who’d shout “Land ho!”. But still that doesn’t mean I’m afraid of waves. I’m even eager to let them carry me. To experience everything, be it happiness or pain. To live in full.

I just want to live in full, to love wholeheartedly. Thank you that you exist.

Thoughts

These skies open their embrace for me.
Kaun hai? A kind, affectionate and a close friend of mine - my dear and my faraway one.
Not a stranger anymore. There's a shadow of these flattering hands over my strings again.
It's a moonlike feeling, calm, deep and wonderful. So what that it's common to compare moon with a woman? To me it's not like that. Moon is not a concrete person, moon is for two. They see the same moon even being far away from each other. It sounds like a delirium but it's my innermost seeing. Seeing that is believing.
I believe in God's grace and I believe in happiness that still exists. And I already feel the warmness of this happiness. It's something that's out here, very close and is possible to come true.
Even if I deceive myself I feel like living in these soft moonrays.